Quotes from Episode4 - Fear and Loathing at the Fundraiser

Meredith convinces Hank to escort her to an environmental fundraiser. Coincidentally Bill and Karen are at the same event, where Karen makes a scene, and Hank runs into Dani and Charlie while they are in his office.

For a radical environmentalist such as yourself, this whole evening must have given you a clit-boner.

You need a double dose of Viagra to get wood and you wear a fanny pack on the weekends.

Fuck around all you want, I’m no judge Judy. But don’t string a woman along for a major chunk of her childbearing years. That’s not cool.

When you’ve spent the last five years loving a man and wondering why he doesn’t love you back…you tend to get a wee bit cynical about things.

Take it easy there, Diane Arbus. Don’t have a coronary, ’cause I wouldn’t know how to explain that to your wife.

One minute, I am sailing along, I’m being the guy who would never, ever cheat on his wife. The next second, I’m spanking the bare, naked ass of a 22-year-old girl.

If you’re having problems in the boudoir, it’s worth a conversation with the old lady.

Time to hang up your drinking shoes, lady.

Well, I’m not much one for causes, good or otherwise. I’m not a joiner.

And that’s the thing with you, Hank. One never knows what to expect from you or your dong.

Now I’m Hank Moody the blogger, soon to be Hank Moody the bartender.

Well, that’s what I do. I entertain.

I find interesting to hear these people ranting and raving about saving the environment when they’ll probably blow like 10 000 pounds of fuel on their private jet planes getting down to Cabo this weekend. That’s right, babs. You heard me. Tell Oprah I said so. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, ladies.

I want to be a 40-year-old virgin. Because it seems like, once you get laid, your life basically turns to shit.

Talk, really? Has anything good ever come of such a thing ever?

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